Another Scary Movie, SPOILER ALERT

One of the cool things about insomnia is that you can wake up at 4:00 in the morning with grand ideas about all that time stretching out before you, time in which you can decide things like wow, I'll get those drapes hemmed and those new pants hemmed and read Margaret Atwood and blah blah blab. . .

One of the things I like to do at 4:00 in the morning is watch a good or even a crappy movie, either a watch instantly one or one that has arrived in the mail in one of those festive and delicious little red envelopes. I like to drink coffee and prowl around the house and celebrate the little things, like there are no upstairs neighbors snorting coke and falling down drunk at 4:00 in the morning like there used to be back in the days of 9th St. in Pocatello, ID when I was trying to study for my doctoral exams.

In short, the upside to insomnia is that if you live alone and own your own home, you can pretty much do anything you want at 4:00 in the morning. But there's a downside to all this glory. When you really haven't had much sleep, you ought not watch a movie like "Distubia".

Flashback: Last night I was at the Franklin Hotel in Rome enjoying a delicious meal, and a friend said that she always wanted to live in the country, but being a single woman prohibits that. Since I feel stupidly and ridiculously invulnerable all the time, I thought how silly. I told her "you don't want to live in the country because it's boring," something I truly believe after living nine, ten and then three miles from the nearest town in various houses in various parts of southern and southeastern Idaho. Since I am so stupidly Jersey girl about such things, I didn't give any real thought to vulnerability, that is until I watch "Disturbia" and two hours later realized I had every light in the house on and almost jumped out of my chair when the washing machine switched cycles.

The thing is, David Morse is THAT GOOD at being that guy -- that creepy, smart, quiet everyman whom you can't really quite imagine could turn out to really be "that guy" even though you know he's gonna turn out to be that guy. And that movie is don't-look-out-the-kitchen-window-while-you're-rinsing-out-the-coffee-pot scary. It's so well done. It's turn-down-Deutsche-Welle-Radio-so-you-can-listen-for-the-bump-in-the-bump-in-the-night scary.

BTW, I broke the coffee pot, a french press.

So, all this made me think about scary movie heroes and antiheroes, villains and villains we admire. I'm wondering what kinds of villains really scare you, even if you're like me and not easily scared. I think for me it's the quiet Anthony Hopkins super brainiac type, the one who plans and whom you can't imagine losing his (her?) cool. Of course, there's also scariness of the brute force of sheer and aggressive quick paced evil.

So, finally here's my point. Who scares you? It would really say a lot about how secure ya'lls are in your masculinity (Clark?, Nicks?, Mikey?) if some a yous posted, but I bet I can get Jess to share on this one. On second thought, with her keen analytical mind she probably doesn't get scared. After all, she figured out Bill Unwin pretty quickly.

Jess, in response I predict that Missy will try (and I hope not succeed) to eat some of the many chocolates my father will receive for Christmas. I predict that on Christmas Eve while we're all stuffing ourselves with deli, she will be ever-so-sneakily sniffing around the Christmas tree. I will try my best to be vigilant and watchful, but once I have that second Manhattan I sometimes let my guard down. Of course Missy will be glued to the dining room table as long as the aforementioned cold cuts are still a presense.

SELF SERVING AND SHAMELESS PLUG: If you're in the Utica area and ready to kill someone with cabin fever, come on out to the Winter Solstice Reading, Open Mic, Music (I promise Christmas carols), Pinata, anything else you can imagine extravaganza. Bring a "b" as long as you promise not to give the high school kids any. It should be fun. It starts at 7:00 at the College Street Cafe and Artist Studio at 34 College Street in Clinton, NY.